Recently, I was reading from ‘the confessions of St Augustine’.
He was reflecting after his conversion on his past life.
He said that it was God and not his own ability that enabled him to recognise the ‘light’ within. With this inner understanding, he was able to recognise the true order of priorities.
He had for a long time got caught up in beautiful things in creation around him.
He had stayed there on the ‘surface’ of things and not recognising who was behind it all.
The inner life that he is referring to is God.
He had let the creature get in the way of getting to the creator.
As he was begging to grow, he used to say ‘Lord make me chaste but not just yet’.
He reflects on the image of ordinary food changing into us. However, we change into being like God when we are fed by God. We become more like the image of God that we are meant to be.
He reached out to all this but could not get there until he found Christ.
He is the way the truth and the life.
In our weakness, it is Jesus the Word made flesh who gives the baby food we need to start growing in the Spiritual life.
He had been held back by creatures and creation that should have led him to the creator!
When we choose something, we always choose some good about it.
However, we often forget the greater good and settle for what is the lesser good!
Augustine then goes into that beautiful exclamation.
‘Late have I loved you, Beauty so ancient and so new, late have I loved you!
Lo, you were within,
But I outside looking there for you,
Looking at the shapely things that you have made
I rushed headlong – I, misshapen.
You were with me but I was not with you.
They held me back from you,
those things that would have no being,
We’re they were not in you…’